Bedrock

Part IV—Making Peace When love is absent or corrupted, as it is in our culture, the result is strife, alienation, and even murderous rampages like the one at Virginia Tech. Parents and mentors who love children can significantly reduce alienation and resentment, , but many still grow up without the clarity and certainty of love necessary for healthy maturity. They become depressed or angry loners who may harm themselves or others. At the least, they continue the expansion of a part of the culture of those who fail at relationships and are never able to enjoy the blessings of emotional or healthy physical intimacy. Since some differences are normal for everyone, and since those least loved tend to handle conflict the worst, the need for peacemakers is great. Yet, the direction of our culture is toward greater hostility, anger, and strife. Political rhetoric is more vitriolic, and even sports are filled with angry, trash-talking players. Talk shows like “Jerry ...

Part III—Learning to Love The Virginia Tech massacre and Alec Baldwin’s voice-mail recorded rant to his daughter were an ironic concurrence in the same week, the latter a demonstration of what may cause the former. Children and young people who feel unloved, unwanted, condemned, put down, and abused mature into angry, potentially destructive adults. Some become self-destructive and violent even as children. Alec Baldwin epitomizes this narcissistic culture, in which far too many parents abuse the children who need their authentic love. I remember watching a mother say to her daughter, “I love you,” which was her signal to “Get me a Pepsi!” Perhaps it was harmless, but I found it appalling. The more self-serving the parent the greater is the potential for emotionally damaging the child. At the least, deep insecurities foster further self-centered attitudes; at the worst, self-doubt leads to self-destruction or aggression toward others they may blame for hurting them. In a cultu...

Part II—If It’s Really Love! Has America become a place that creates monsters, like the student who killed 32 students and teachers at Virginia Tech, the father who murdered schoolgirls in Pennsylvania, the mother who drowned her own babies, or the 2 boys who killed their classmates in Littleton, Colorado? Some would blame guns, but earlier generations who openly carried and wore firearms never did things like this, in arguably more violent times. Vocal advocates have demanded less violent movies, TV, video games, and even cartoons, but these troubling shootings in schools, of all places, seem only to have gotten worse. Something deeper inspires such evil. Violence in the commission of a crime is bad, but killing out of the crazed anger of a disturbed person demands an explanation. Is the formation of a sociopath mere accident, or do predictable factors encourage his or her creation? Even when evil or illness provokes a person to do something terrible, do other influences aggravat...

Part I—A Crisis of Self-Centeredness Yet another shooting, this one the worst in American history, should [1] have everyone asking, “What's gone wrong? What causes students to kill classmates and then themselves? Why does a parent murder children, even infants? What can be done? Someone should do something!" Leaders, experts, talk show hosts and callers are puzzled, angry, certain they could have prevented the tragedy somehow. Predictably, the anti-gun crowd calls for more gun control, ignoring the reality that many violent offenders already ignore current laws [2] . Others will offer certain convictions of the cause--movie and TV violence, the Internet, poor parents, loss of values, mental illness, MTV, the media, the Democrats, or conservatives! Authorities, from school officials and police to the President, will promise to do something, but their pledges, in the light of uncertain and conflicting opinions of the causes, will be meaningless. Yet they will promise more schoo...

What makes life good? I can imagine lots of answers: love, money, pleasure, friends, and family are probably at the top of most lists. I would rather say health, love, peace, joy, security, and hope, along with having the basics of food, clothing, and shelter. Is there really a difference? To a great extent, the differences reflect two different ways of seeing ourselves and the world. One is self-centered, limited in scope, and doomed to fail. The other is more balanced, unlimited in possibilities, and filled with promise. I suspect most people really want the latter but get caught in the former. Those who know better and still focus on the former are what I would call evil. I’m not writing about either list. Instead, I will discuss four words that, to me, represent the substance of a lifestyle that can change the world. It has changed the world in the past, and it is still happening today, in some parts of the world. It is, in my opinion, the key to protecting our American ...